We were bound to travel from our homeland to the venue of WYC 2025. By this time, my emotions were all over the place, I am thrilled, nervous, scared, excited, and most importantly looking forward to what might happen to me, to us – my friends, our coordinators, and our sisters and brothers.
Before participating in this year’s WYC, I believed I was already a “good” believer (well, at least for me). I went to church every Sunday, I served, I even traveled far—even though the commute fee was high and the travel time was long. I had to wake up early since it was quite far, but those things didn’t stop me from going to His haven every time I was “supposed to”, since it was the Holy One’s day.Well, that was what I used to believe. I thought it was simply a job or task to be completed. And yes, I also liked the limelight that came with it. But as time passed, I grew- with the Lord God beside me, of course. I firmly believe that without His guidance and support, I wouldn’t even be breathing right now. I can say this because I’ve tried, not just once or twice, but maybe dozens of times or more.
Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I try to find an Adoration Chapel. If I can’t find one, even a small chapel or quiet place will do. I pray. I pray that the thoughts would stop, that the whispers would disappear, and that all the negative thoughts and energy would vanish. And all I can say is, it works. Well, with a few tear stains of course.
I called myself a “good” believer because I don’t think I was worthy of being called a great one. There were thoughts in my head that were very dark. I was a doubting believer. A lot of brothers and sisters shared similar experiences of doubt. But I believed I was different.
I didn’t doubt by saying “Lord, bakit ganon? Anak mo rin naman ako pero bakit ganito?” or “Bakit sila meron? Bakit ako ni kapirasong tiyansa wala?” No. I doubted by trying to find holes under His name—loopholes, if you will. I questioned, “Eh kung ganon, bakit mo ginanyan?” or “You stated that, then why is that?” Also, “Kung mapagpatawad ka, bakit sila hindi?” and “Kung ikaw ang may gawa, bakit may pagkukulang? May pagkakamali?”. These were the thoughts that used to run through my mind, thoughts that my current self would now laugh at and shake my head in disbelief. But during WYC 2025, I realized I wasn’t alone in feeling this way. I wasn’t the only one who felt unworthy or unseen by Him. In fact, I was the one hiding when in reality, He was the One searching for me, no matter the ocean or sea of doubt and sin I was under. I realized: I will remain anchored in Him.
When we got back home, I was scrolling through my phone after unpacking and preparing to sleep after the tiring travel. While scrolling, I came across Cardinal Tagle’s homily, it was about his trip home due to a family member’s passing. When he returned to his parish, he told his spiritual director the whole story. After hearing it, the SD asked him: “Anong bus ang sinakyan mo? In everything you did on that journey, were you truly following Jesus?”. I think WYC 2025 was Christ’s way of leading me to follow Him, deeper than I’ve ever followed before, to anchor myself in Him. When I registered for WYC, it was rash, sudden, and quick. Why? Because I thought it was the last day of registration for the OCCI anniversary, not WYC. The next day, I realized there was no such registration for the anniversary! I was shocked, thinking, “Nagsayang ako ng almost ₱2k for reg 😭”. Then I thought—what if ituloy ko na lang? First time ko naman, at naka-register na ako. Then I found out na pamasahe pa lang, libo rin, so I hesitated again. BUT PRAISE GOD, I remembered I hadn’t sold my books yet. So I sold them, 3 days before WYC 2025. I was able to secure my transportation fees! Kinailangan ko rin magpaalam kay mama ko. I knew she wouldn’t easily allow me to go to WYC. So I bargained with her, “Last na ’to Ma, promise!” (Of course… last for this year’s vacation 🤭) And YES, THANKS BE TO GOD, natuloy ako! And there I realized so many things. It was His way of showing me: “Anak, you can go deeper. Dive deep within, and I’ll accompany you, through people, through new friends you’ll meet, through words, through moments that will deepen your faith and trust in Me.”
AND THAT IS MY WYC 2025. 🕊️🌊
